


Life (Not) at the Frankenstein Place

by Cececat1



Category: Rocky Horror Picture Show
Genre: Hero's Journey plot, Includes Denton Affair, Multi, Novel, Originally Posted on FanFiction.Net, Robot supporting character, classic literature references, diary format
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-18
Updated: 2016-09-18
Packaged: 2018-08-15 18:57:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,290
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8068912
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cececat1/pseuds/Cececat1
Summary: The diary of Columbia (a groupie). After a few months living at the strange castle, Columbia decides to keep a diary in the hope that she will at least remember what day of the week it is. This weird guy, named Eddie, that Frank brings home one day only makes things crazier... especially when she runs away with Eddie. This was originally written and posted on fanfiction.net back in Early Spring 2016. COMPLETED.





	1. 1

* * *

Sunday, ?/?/1974

Dear diary,

I'm not sure of the exact date. And I only know it's Sunday because Magenta and Frank both said so when questioned at different times. Since I keep loosing track of this stuff, thanks to the castle's weirdness, I've decided to keep a diary.

Next thing you know, I'll forget my own name...

Wow, that's ridiculously dramatic.

Anyway, I'm going to write about my daily life in this diary. Hopefully I'll actually remember to write in it. Something about this place makes you forget sanity.

So... time to write about today.

Earlier, I painted my nails this glittery red color. To my annoyance, they've already begun chipping.

Am I seriously writing something that shallow?!

Whatever. Around here, meaning in the castle, everything is shallow. It seems like my only purpose here is to look pretty and 'have fun'. The definition of 'have fun' varies between 'screw Frankie when he feels like it', 'screw Magenta when you're both bored', and 'tap dance at parties'. What sort of life is that? Earlier, I asked Magenta that exact question.

Her reply?

"It's a life you should be grateful for. You're lucky to have a roof over your head, if those stories you tell are true."

Of course, she's right. It's better than being a 'proper' groupie. I know everyone who lives here, for one thing. And I've a stable source got food to eat, a bed to sleep in. Not to mention a few other luxuries (like running water) that I never had. Plus, they own the castle. That means nobody has to worry about rent or anything.

Maybe it's not so bad.

Oh dear. I've got to stop writing now. Magenta apparently can't sleep with the sound of my pencil scratching at the paper. Yeah, she just threw a pillow at me...

\- Columbia (a groupie)

* * *

Monday, ?/?/1974

Dear diary,

I might as well describe today. It was perfectly normal by castle standards. Therefore it will be the right way to explain life here.

At about 6 AM, Magenta's alarm clock went off. Twenty minutes later, I fell back asleep. Since she's an actual servant she gets up hours before everyone else. Usually, I 'naturally' wake up around 9:30. Today I did, at least.

Then I got dressed in one of my everyday outfits. That meant a fitted, grey, lacy camisole; a glittery silver vest; a pink jacket with pink-and-white striped lining; a short, black skirt trimmed with sequins; glittery fishnet stockings held up by garters; and my usual tap shoes.

Once I'd applied my usual makeup, I went downstairs for breakfast. Breakfast happened to be chocolate chip pancakes. Magenta is a great cook, you know. And she's managed to learn how to prepare 'earthing foodstuff' after only a few months of knowing me.

"The Master wants to see you this evening," she told me.

"Okay..."

"After dinner, of course. The only reason I'm mentioning it now is because I need to tell you before it slipped my mind," she explained.

She'd probably be punished terribly if she forfeits to say something and he found out. That was something I really wanted to avoid. Despite her strange ways, I liked Magenta. And, even before we really got along, I still wouldn't want her to get hurt.

 

After that, I went back to my room to find an outfit for tomorrow. I always had to pick out clothes the day before since it took so long.

Then I'd read a book or whatever. Maybe even see if there's a show on television worth watching. The monitors here don't work like normal TVs and will often play very strange things. Though we usually use them to spy on other rooms, which is a bit twisted. 

When lunchtime came around, I went to the kitchen. After eating smoked salmon on toast I went to the ballroom. Now I would practice my tap dancing. So, for the rest of the afternoon, I practiced various routines. It's more fun than it sounds, you know.

Then it was time for dinner. Frank invited over a 'business partner' from his home planet and we are in the dining room. This 'business parter' apparently knew quite a bit about some sort of science thing Frank was suspiciously interested in.

To avoid falling out of favor with Frank, I didn't speak during the entire meal. I sure was glad when the 'business partner' left (though not before giving Frank a folder full of papers).

After dinner I went straight to Frankie's room, just as Magenta had told me to earlier today.

I spent quite a while in his bed. For some of that time I practically felt like he actually cared for me, nearly loved me. But then, once I'm sent back to my own room, I realize I'm just a groupie with only a decade or so of 'prettiness' left. God, I half wish I could have a picture age in my place. Just like Dorian Gray, the main character of a book I read when I was still that innocent kid years and years ago.

But it's best not to think about the old days. Now I've got to focus on my current life.

Of course, things don't always go exactly like today. But daily life doesn't vary that much from that.

\- Columbia (a groupie)

* * *

Tuesday, ?/?/1974

Dear diary,

Today was interesting, to say the least. But not at first.

I spent most of the morning chatting with Magenta. Pretty normal.

"You know, I think they're up to something," she told me.

"What does that mean?"

"It means that I think the Master and my brother are up to something," she replied, giving me a Look.

To my annoyance, I still didn't get it. "Like what?"

"Earlier I heard them talking. Something about packing. I have a feeling that they are going somewhere."

"Such as..."

"I'm not sure."

The conversation ended there, as Riff entered the room in search of his sister. Silently, he walked over to where she stood and put his arm around her waist.

"Should I leave you guys, er, alone?" I asked.

Magenta nodded gratefully. "Please do."

So, I left the room. I headed for the kitchen. It was about lunch time anyway. And when we haven't got guests over we eat meals there. That's why the dining room is always so messy, I suppose.

To my surprise I didn't see Frank anywhere. Usually he's in the kitchen for lunch at precisely 12:40. Today he somehow wasn't.

Later, I asked Mag.

"He's going away for a while," she told me.

I didn't really have the energy to ask how long 'a while' actually was.

\- Columbia (a groupie)


	2. 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own RHPS.

Friday ?/?/1974

Dear diary,

So, nothing worth noting had happened since Tuesday... until today.

Frankie is home!

Just the fact that he's back puts me in a great mood. Strange as it is, I often feel like life is pointless without him. I devote far too much thought to him, I suppose. When he's away I worry a lot. I'll also do stupid things, like almost overdose in the Zen Room.

I think it's because he rescued me. If he hadn't picked me up in his pick-up truck, I would still be half-starved. Of course, he wasn't really nice at first. But after he began, for brief amounts of time, acting like he cared about me I couldn't help but fall in love with him. I love him too much.

It actually scares me sometimes. I get really worried when he truly ignored me.

To my horror, he ignored me when I greeted him at the door today.

Apparently he met a guy on the trip. I was a bit worried when I first found this out. Then I actually met the guy at dinner this evening. He's chubby, clumsy, not very smart... yet really sweet! Plus, he's not a threat. He's not going to get in the way of my relationship with Frankie. For some reason, as a project, Frank has decided to turn this rather low-class kid into a sophisticated young man.

His name is Edward Davis Scott, by the way. But we call him 'Eddie'.

After dinner, Frank went to the lab to go over a folder of science notes he'd retrieved on the trip he'd gone on. Eddie and I were left alone in the dining room.

"So…" I said. "Where did you meet Frank?"

"He ordered a pizza for dinner one time, but forgot all about that when he saw me. Apparently he decided to teach me to be some sort o' upper class out of pure boredom. I only agreed to run away with him 'cause my uncle was getting a bit to involved in my social life," he explained.

"Right."

We chatted aimlessly for a while. From what I could tell, he didn't really know much about Frank. Though he seemed to like him. Looks wise, at least.

Eddie is cute… in a pathetic way. Like a puppy with a broken leg whose stuck at a dreadful animal shelter where it might die of blood poisoning. Actually, he's nothing like that. I don't know where I got such a morbid idea.

Hanging out with a vampirish alien girl is making me a bit weird.

Speaking of Magenta, I went straight to our room after talking to Eddie. Since it was kind of late at that point we didn't even talk to each other. I just wrote this diary entry.

\- Columbia (a groupie)

* * *

Saturday ?/?/1974

Dear Diary,

Today was pretty boring. Yeah, Frankie _is_ back at home. But we haven't really seen much of each other. He's been busy in the lab, researching some project. Magenta claims that her brother does more work than 'ze master'. For some reason I can't help but believe her when it comes to that.

Whatever.

So nothing really happened all day. I spent most of it chatting with Magenta.

Like many Saturdays, Mag and I spent the evening watching a film. This time it was _2001: A Space Odyssey._ That film is so… I don't even know. It makes your brain hurt. The space-baby-whatever at the end… my God I don't even know what that movie is meant to be about. There's this computer who goes crazy called HAL 9000… and he wouldn't let anything get in the way of his mission.

My brain hurts!

Clever old Magenta finds the film amusing.

"It's not zat confusing. You humans are so silly!" she told me.

"Then what's the meaning of it?" I asked.

"Something involving… something…" Mags replied vaguely.

At this, I giggled. "You don't know!"

She rolled her eyes. "That's the sort of picture that's not meant to be understood."

Once the movie had ended we played a board game called 'Clue'. Of course, that wasn't very fun. We only have about earthling three board games.

After that, I wrote this.

\- Columbia (a groupie)

* * *

**A/N: Though I haven't seen it in a while, I remember that _2001: A Space Odyssey_ is very, very, very, very weird. It's from 1968 and famous for being a film hippies would go to whilst stoned. I don't know why I thought Magenta and Columbia would like to watch it, though...**

* * *

Sunday ?/March/1974

Dear Diary,

Today I figured out what month it is! It's March! Of course, I'm still not sure about the date.

But it's still awesome to know what month it currently is.

God, hardly a year ago I would've never said that. But I try not to think about the outside world too much. When I do, I always become ridiculously sad. That annoys _everyone_ \- including my roommate, who I'm closest with. It's best not to annoy the only person here who's always nice to me.

Whatever.

I should probably explain how I figured out that it's March. Well, it was all because of Eddie. We ate lunch together today. Magenta ate with us too, of course. But she hasn't warmed up to Eddie yet, so she won't really speak when he's around. As far as I know she's like that with everyone. It took a while for her to be comfortable talking to me, when Frankie first brought me home. I wonder how long ago that was.

Anyway… on with the story!

So, at lunch, I decided to ask Eddie about the outside world. That was a bit of a challenge, since I didn't want to give anything away. I was pretty sure he doesn't know about the aliens yet. But then, just as I was about to speak, he asked a question.

"Are you an alien, too?"

That really surprised me. How did he know that they were aliens? Frankie didn't tell me until weeks after I got here. At least, I think it was weeks.

"No. I'm a normal earthling… like you," I explained, after a moment.

"Hm."

We sat in odd silence for a while. It was then that Riff came looking for his sister. She left the room with him. Now, Eddie and I were alone.

"How long have you been here?" he asked.

"I'm not sure. It's really annoying," I replied unhappily.

"Do you remember what month you met Frank?"

I thought about this for a moment. "It was late summer or early autumn. Probably September. I'm not really sure. Everything before the castle seems like a partially forgotten dream. Pretend…"

"Right now it's March. If ya did end up here in September, that's seven months livin' in this place," he said thoughtfully.

Only few seconds later, Mags returned to the room. Frankie wanted to 'see me'. An hour after that, I went back to my room.

There I read a random book for a few hours. Magenta has a bookshelf with all different earthling books on it. Most of them are weird. The one I began to read was about this painter who painted a picture of this guy he was clearly in love with. It wasn't very interesting, and I only read about a chapter.

After that was dinner. Frank went on and on about some science project he's working on. Nobody else got a chance to talk. It was so boring I zoned out for most of it.

Ah! Magenta is complaining about the 'pencil scratching noise'. I'd better stop writing...

\- Columbia (a groupie)

* * *

 


	3. 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't own RHPS.

Monday March/?/1974

Dear diary,

Today was pretty normal.

Unfortunately, I'd forgotten to pick out an outfit yesterday. So I got up about an hour before usual (which isn't fun). The outfit I ended up wearing consisted of a glittery t-shirt I'd bought in New York City ages ago; a dark grey vest; black and grey pinstripe shorts; sheer black stockings; and my usual rhinestone-adorned tap shoes.

Once the day's fashion was sorted out, I went downstairs in search of breakfast. Today that meant scrambled eggs and toast. Magenta must be mad at me. Or maybe she just doesn't understand that few foods are more unpleasant than room temperature scrambled eggs.

Of course, rather than attempting to make my own breakfast, I _did_ end up eating it. Being a terrible cook isn't a good thing.

I found Magenta dusting the Library's many shelves. That's the room where nearly all the books here are kept. It's the sort of place you wouldn't expect to find in a castle like this. No, more the sort of thing you might see in an old fashioned mansion.

The Library is strangely beautiful. Unlike a 'real' library, silence isn't enforced or even suggested by anyone. Yet you still get the feeling that you aren't supposed to talk too loudly. You feel like it might annoy the books, strange as that sounds.

"I zink zat new boy likes you," Magenta said, as I entered the room.

That sure got my attention. "Really?"

"Yes," she replied vaguely.

"How do you know?" I asked, desperate to find out more.

She shrugged. "I just do."

That's the last she'd say on the subject. I wondered briefly if she was up to something sinister. Then she suddenly changed the topic of conversation, which distracted me.

"Have you read any good books lately?" Magenta asked.

My eyes widened in surprise. " _What_? Since when do you ask about books?"

She raised an eyebrow. "I can read, you know. You've seen that shelf in my room."

"Yeah…"

"The point is that I think you'll be able to stay sane longer if you read something. A good book can metaphorically take you away from your own troubles, some people say."

Her random advice made me suspect that maybe she had some mad plot in mind. She was _definitely_ up to something.

I ate lunch with Eddie. Today we spoke about random, trivial things.

"Do you ever go to the pictures?" I asked him.

"Yeah. Though my uncle stop letting me live with him- said I was old enough to survive on my own- I used to go to the pictures all the time. Last film I saw was this thing called _2001: A Space Odyssey_. Still don't know what it was about…."

I chuckled. "Magenta and I watched that nonsense last Saturday. I still don't get it!"

"I think it's a- whatzitcalled? Thingy that symbolizes stuff. Whatever it symbolizes is too confusing for me, though."

"It confused me, too," I replied, smiling slightly.

After lunch I went and practiced my tap dance routine. I kept wondering when the next party would be.

For some reason I only danced for half the time I'd planned to today. I guess I'm tired or something. My mind kept wandering and I couldn't focus on my feet. Silly, isn't it? To my annoyance, I keep thinking about two certain people.

Frank is physically attractive and has an air of mystery to him. The fact that he's sometimes heartless and spiteful only makes his more interesting.

It's like that guy in that one strange book we read in sophomore year (that's the last year I attended high school). _Wuthering Heights_ it's called. This character called Heathcliff isn't nice at all… yet, according to my English teacher, he's got a million fangirls. That's not _exactly_ like Frank, of course. But when I really think about it, I'm nothing more than something to entertain him. I try not to think about it.

Eddie, on the other hand… he's actually nice. He's adorable and perfectly ordinary. Something about him is just so cute. The fact that he's a bit fat isn't really important. You see, it's his personality that matters. Ha! It's been years since I cared about personality. The bands I traveled with were made up of attractive guys. And they were nearly all _total_ _bastards_. Seems like I've finally found the boyfriend I've always wanted.

Of course, I'm supposed to be Frank's devoted groupie. I'm not allowed to 'get involved' with his other 'playthings'. If I do, I might get kicked out. That means no stable source of food, no guarantee of a safe place to sleep… none of the other luxuries I have here at the castle.

Yeah, my pathetic new crush on Eddie made dinner awkward. Especially when Frankie started flirting with both of us at nearly the same time.

Something about Frank is hypnotizing. When he looks at me a certain way or says a certain thing I can't help but forget how he's hurt me.

It scares me.

After dinner, I went to my room. Magenta was there, painting her nails. That reminds me… my red nail polish is chipping. I'll fix it tomorrow. Right now I want to read more of that book with the painter character. It's a good distraction from real life.

So I'd better stop writing now.

\- Columbia (a groupie)

* * *


End file.
